Friday, February 10, 2012

What I Don't Know Can't Hurt Me


This week, I've dedicated the blog to  I'm Hearing Voices , which  has turned out to be an awesome blogfest hosted by Cassie Mae at Reading, Writing, and Lovin' it! and Angie at Live to Write...Edit when Necessary. 

This blogfest was a series of writing exercises we had to post on the 6th, 8th and 10th of February, and since I love stretching those writing muscles, I decided to join in!

After my post on Monday and Wednesdayy, here's what the hosts want us to do today, the 10th of February: 
Emotion Flash Fiction: Emotion is the engine of a story. Pick an emotion and in a flash fiction piece of 250 words MAKE us feel it! We want to connect with your character. This will be a challenge in 250 words.
 

Here's my attempt, and the character whose voice we hear is Anjali, the one who was mentioned by Churi and Vrishchik in my last post on dialogue . Here she is wondering about Vrishchik.

What I don't know can't hurt me-- I've gone that route before. Do I want to try it again?

 Yes, his eyes are the shade of burnt caramel, that darken when I’m around. He is gorgeous, shy, ten years younger, everything I want. 

When he rubs lotion on my legs, the frissons on my skin make me want to take things further. 

Character storyboard Anjali Menon
This Delhi winter makes your skin dry, he says. Take care of your skin, it is what makes you beautiful. Beauty is not skin deep, I say, kissing his full lower lip. You never know, he says, and his lop-sided grin makes me want to drag him to the bedroom. 

I don't. We've only just met, and if he is pacing it, so should I. Boys love the chase, only I wish he’d hurry up. And marrying a chef is exactly the sort of thing I would advice me, if I were my own therapist. I need nurturing. This is what they warn us against in my profession-- psychiatrists analyse everyone, themselves, most of all. So stop it already, Ms Anjali Menon. 

But why do I sometimes feel his smile switches on a milli-second too late, that his kiss seems like he taught it to himself, that his face is sometimes a mask that moves? And when I catch him staring at me, I step back as if blown back by an autumn gust of wind? 

Sometimes the quietness of his gaze frightens me. There, I said it.



21 opinions:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I wouldn't hold back! Oh wait, yeah I would...

Li said...

You've managed to pack a lot of emotion - and some back story - into very few words! I like the hints of passion, the trepidation, and the internal struggle of Ms Menon.

Miranda Hardy said...

Great emotions in this scene. Very vivid and interesting.

Kelley said...

Very interesting. Very well written. Love this!

Tasha Seegmiller said...

Great job - I kind of want her to go for it, but I don't because it could mean trouble.

Emily R. King said...

Ah, attraction, and dare I say lust? Nice.

Tracy Jo said...

Love this and want to read more!

Clare said...

Oh this was haunting. Underneath the lust and desire I could feel Anjali has for Vrishchik, I also felt a similar uneasy tension to what you showed in Wednesday's piece.

Excellent.

You have a real talent for setting a tone.

Thanks for sharing.

Rick G said...

Attraction, lust, indecision. There's so much emotion packed in there that I can't pick just one. Awesome bit of flash fiction.

Hywela Lyn said...

As Rick says, Attraction, lust, indecision. All three emotions come through this piece very strongly.

Great writing!

Kyra Lennon said...

I felt every word of that, like Anjali was talking directly to me, and I could really hear how much her doubts about him are coming to the surface.

Lovely work!

Ashley Nixon said...

Man, she's so conflicted! But I don't trust this 10 year younger guy! Apparently neither does Anjali!

Angela Cothran said...

Gorgeous writing! Really, just beautiful. I can FEEL how she feels about him :) Loved it!

Dianne Gardner said...

Wow, is all I can say. I'm going to read your other posts now. Sorry I'm late!

Cassie Mae said...

Oh just jump his bones! Haha!

This was great. Totally sexy and frightening all at the same time :)

Donna Hole said...

Excellent internalization. A nice glimpse into what is important to this character.

......dhole

Madeleine Maddocks said...

Oh gosh I like the conflicting emotions!

Angela Cothran said...

I wanted you to know you are in my top 10 for this challenge :)

Lynda R Young said...

You've captured a nice amount of tension and emotion. Well done.

nutschell said...

Hey Damyanti,
The mistress of description strikes again! Love this post. Looking forward to reading your writing origins post soon:) I've always been curious!

Nutschell
www.thewritingnut.com

Jean said...

I read and write for a living, and I am also a jewelry designer. You just knocked my socks off. You are a gem!
Which gets me thinking:
If you really WERE a gem, I am seeing you as the highest quality opal...mysterious, sensuous, and flashing glints of incredible colors unexpectedly.
Thanks for this blog entry. I loved it.
See you in the A-Z challenge this year, once again! jean